12 Advanced Sex Tips From Women
“We’re always encouraged to reach for the lube, but (especially if you’re on the smaller side), it can sometimes help to leave it off. Too much can lead to too little sensitivity for your partner – a little friction is what sex depends upon. The trick is just to make sure you indulge in enough foreplay to allow her to get wet. If she’s struggling but you don’t want to over-grease the engine, opt for a half a pea sized blob of something non-chemical, such as Sliquid’s H2O.”
Lists of sex tricks are ten a penny on the old gossip wall that is the internet. Anyone that’s ever got it on can cobble together a must-do-between-the-sheets list. But what moves do the sexual elite pull in the sanctuary of their own bedrooms? We’ve probed the best educators and hottest adult performers to bring you a piping hot dozen …
“When I’m asked what the number one tip is to better sex, I always say “conscious breathing,” says Lady Cheeky, aka Los Angeles School of Sex Education Mistress, Elle Chase. “By controlling your breath you also control the oxygen in your bloodstream. Highly oxygenated blood gives our bodies more energy and helps our organs function toward their highest potential. Just learning how to do one very simple, specific breathing technique like Breath of Fire or synchronised breathing with your partner during sex and at climax can significantly improve your pleasure in the moment.”
2. Master your ohhh-xclamations
If there’s one much-neglected sense when it comes to arousal, it’s the oracular. Most of us leave dirty talk for the occasional drunken dial but if the erotic fiction trend is anything to go by, women love explicit words and you’d do well to exploit that. But nobody wants you to stutter, so pre-record her a hot voice memo. You can practice, record, listen back, and re-record until you’re happy with the effort. Time carefully when you send it – when she’s just waking up, just going to bed, or when she hints she’s horny is best. It’s also great practice for the live version.
3. Oral Queening it
Sure, some women like to lie back and think of England while you go to tongue-town, but you can raise the game by raising her. Two variations for a more intense sensation: first up, get her to lie with her head over the bed. The angle will give her a double head rush and intensify the orgasm. Second, ask her to go on her hands on knees (or knees and forearms if it’s more comfortable) and approach her from behind. The ‘reverse tongue’ effect it creates will blow her mind.
4. Blowjob angling
“Many penises curve to one side or the other,” says Sophie Delancey, from TheArtofBlowjob.com. “It makes sense to approach your lady from an angle which will help best fit. If you curve slightly to the left or right, you can approach from that side, often easiest by having the recipient on their back in the middle of the bed while the giver crouches or lays at the appropriate angle of approach. This also allows the recipient to stimulate the giver as well.”
5. Vibrators make anal that bit easier
Some women are game to try anal sex but it can be a struggle to relax enough to facilitate it. Porn performer Casey Calvert recommends this jiggery-pokery: “Encourage her to pleasure herself with her favourite vibrator. The more she’s concentrating on front-end sensation, the less likely she is to tense up, so giving you the perfect opportunity to lube up and ease in.” And if she orgasms while she’s vibing? Even better.
If you’re intrigued by the idea of her anally stimulating you but don’t want to be “ridden”, get yourself an Aneros massager. It’s a great way to explore the sensitivity around that whole area, and can give you a fabulous prostate massage if you want to go that far. Either way, it’ll intensify your orgasm.
7. Pegging plus
Once you’ve popped your pegging cherry, you’ll probably find that her cock play is just part of the pleasure – and that you’re ready to work your own member back in to proceedings. Given that your lady is likely to have her hands busy help her out and intensify your own orgasms by taking the helm yourself. Los Angeles sex educator Anne Hodder recommends adding a sleeve masturbator to proceedings. “Try the The Fleshjack by Fleshlight, a patented masturbator encased in a plastic sleeve that creates a suction sensation with every stroke. You can stroke to the beat of her thrusts and, together, they create an incredibly intense ‘dance’ that’ll end in raging orgasms.”
8. Forget about measuring up
Worrying about how long (or wide) your schlong is unnecessarily impairs sexual performance and your own fun. As co-editor of An Intimate Education, Emily Dubberley explains, “A study examining 60 years’ worth of studies found men cared way more than women about size – and as many women wished their partner was smaller as wished bigger. The vast majority of ladies were happy with what they got.
9. Check in with her pressure points
What a woman needs to build up to orgasm is usually different to what clinches climax. Juna Honey, a leading escort at Sheri’s Ranch, Nevada, advocates asking before the get-go. “I need clitoral stimulation to lead me there, but slow, deep penetration as I’m orgasming.” Too many men make that classic mistake: not asking for directions.
10. Occasionally, leave off the lube
We’re always encouraged to reach for the lube, but (especially if you’re on the smaller side), it can sometimes help to leave it off. Too much can lead to too little sensitivity for your partner – a little friction is what sex depends upon. The trick is just to make sure you indulge in enough foreplay to allow her to get wet. If she’s struggling but you don’t want to over-grease the engine, opt for a half a pea sized blob of something non-chemical, such as Sliquid’s H2O.
11. Take it to the floor
When was the last time you had sex on the floor? Probably not since you were a teenager, so it will bring back frantic, horny memories the next time you hit the deck. It’s also a great way to use friction to your advantage, helping to make her feel “full up”. Just be sure to place a blanket underneath. You remember the carpet burn, don’t you?
12. Don’t forget to… kiss
Adult empresses Gianna Michaels and Sophie Dee have performed acts on tape many of us couldn’t get our heads around, let alone cock a leg over. But even for screen queens like these, acts of intimacy still have the ultimate impact. “Don’t forget my neck,” says Ms Michaels. “Kiss. Nibble. Gently bite it. It takes me to another level of pleasure.” Sophie has it even simpler. “While you’re fucking me? Don’t forget to make out with me.”