Confession time; I am terrified of the ocean. Not just the ocean, really any body of water, or even like, a stream, or water dripping off a roof, or a garbage can lid turned upside down and left out in the rain. It’s not a fear that I feel the need to confront, I am perfectly happy being afraid of water. Specifically the animals and plants in it. Really anything with a slime element just gives me the hardcore creeps. That’s why when I heard that one of my favorite lubricants was releasing a new formula called Sliquid Oceanics which is infused with elements of the ocean, I had very mixed feelings. If I wouldn’t even dare to put my foot in the ocean, would I dare to put something from the ocean in my ass? These are the deepest thoughts I ever have.