Dirty talk… you either love or are completely terrified of it. While it can feel intimidating to get verbally naughty with your partner, many would agree that a little word play can be one of the best kinds of foreplay. Before you decide that you’d rather die than utter sexy somethings, try these dirty talk tips on for size.

Don’t Think About It Too Much

Dirty talk doesn’t have to be reminiscent of what you’ve seen in porn or on the big screen. Don’t spend too much time thinking about what you’re going to say. Keep it simple and natural by expressing when something feels good. A simple “oh god!” can be super sexy (and encourage him or her to keep doing what they’re doing)! The more thought you put into it, the more likely it is that you’re going to trip over your tongue and have an awkward moment. This happens to even the best dirty talkers out there. If it happens to you, just laugh it off. Your partner will think you’re adorable for trying and you’ll get over your fear of messing up!

Say What You Want to Hear

Think about what would turn you on and say that. Chances are your partner will enjoy it, too. Hearing yourself saying those things could serve double duty and get both of you revved up. If you’re not sure what you’d like to hear, pull inspiration from sources outside the bedroom. Reading some erotica or watching a sexy rom-com could give you some great ideas. However, it is important to keep your audience in mind. If you have a more conservative partner, you want to honor their boundaries.

It’s Less About What You Say Than How You Say It

You don’t have to be raunchy or explicit to excel at dirty talk. Quite the opposite, in fact. Whispering, “I want you so badly right now” is incredibly sexy. Lowering your voice, putting an emphasis on certain words, and drawing out some syllables can take an otherwise normal phrase and turn it into a verbal orgasm. “I loooove they way your body feels” is a pretty simple phrase but spending a little extra time on the word “love” turns it into a sentence that feels just as sexy as his body does on you!

Draw Out Your Partner’s Desires

If you’re feeling shy about talking dirty to your partner, try this. Whisper in their ear, “What do you want me to do to you?”. This communicates that you want to please them and gets them to open up about what they want. You’re essentially asking them to talk dirty to you.

If you’re ready to use words to spice things up in the bedroom, don’t be embarrassed. Start small, keep it simple, and use your partner’s reaction to gauge your follow up phrases. Getting feisty in the sack doesn’t have to make you want to crawl in a hole. And who knows, maybe you’ll discover something new about your lover and yourself when your words get their juices flowing!